My Running Journal

by Stephanie Crick

6/5/2011 – Army Training Course Needed!

Well hello everyone, lots of things have changed since I last wrote. I did think that Eden would be keeping this journal going but he has been working so hard that he hasn’t been able to spare any time for anything else. Me too, I’ve been very busy at work and this has meant that there hasn’t been much running going on either.
We really enjoyed watching the London marathon, and both would one day love to be able to run it and other marathons around the world. In fact, Eden’s sister was all set to run in London but a virus struck her down and she couldn’t keep up with her training so had to cancel for this year. She gets in next year automatically and at least has plenty of time to get fit again. She was so disappointed when the virus meant her chances of running where stopped as she has diligently applied every year for the past five years to run in the marathon.
 
Anyway things in the Crick household have become a little less sporty than ever before. I have to say that my stress fracture still gives me trouble so I daren’t try to run properly again as it always ends in tears, frustration and disillusionment. Without my running I must admit that I am an elusive figure at the gym, and have really almost stopped going altogether. There is always something else to do and because work has been so busy then this is a good excuse.

The sad fact is that running and me going to the gym went hand in hand. I lifted weights to build up my upper body so it would be stronger when I ran. I toned my core through ab exercises and yoga and Pilates so that it would be able to support me properly as I ran and make my running stronger and also help with endurance and stamina. I ran because I loved it and to strengthen my legs and lungs. When I couldn’t run on the street and didn’t have a plan in my head where I would run, the gym was the ideal option and I really do like running on a treadmill.
But without my running a lot of these activities which I participated in at the gym seemed a bit pointless. I carried on for a long time and instead of running on the treadmill I power walked up high gradients. However, the buzz wasn’t there. I continued for some time before work became mega busy and I decided really that without running all I wanted to do in my down time was relax. Oh, yes, and also eat chocolate. Lots of it!!

I have put on weight as my job is very sedentary and since I’ve not been to the gym in a while I’m certainly not as fit or toned as I was. I also have very little energy, as running would give me a boost every single time I did it. It would also last until the next day too until I ran again. I know that I probably sound sorry for myself, and I think that I am a little!!

However, you guys know that Steph does not give up and goes down fighting!! So, I needed a little bit of a kick and a challenge to get me going all guns blazing again!! This kick has come in a military style course of training with an ex army trainer which begins next week. Now, normally, I would be so excited about testing my abilities in a situation like this and I would have extreme drive and determination to push through my boundaries. But, because I’ve only been training sporadically I feel lethargic and quite unenthusiastic about it. A bit like how I felt at school when we were made to exercise out in the cold for lengthy periods. I hated sports at school!
But, guys, I know this is the right thing for me to do. It will be mega tough and will test me to the limits and I just hope that I get back my old sense of enthusiasm, energy and positivity towards exercise. If this won’t penetrate deep into my brain by pulling out those old serotonin happy chemicals then nothing will.
I think that the worst thing is that I am going to be tested in front of the other members on the course and I am embarrassed about my state of health and fitness. I know that it isn’t anywhere near where it should be and was and this will be highlighted in front of others. I also know that I may not be able to perform as I would like and that others will probably outperform me.
 
I hope I can lose the ego and just enjoy myself, as this will be the hardest thing to overcome. Whenever I do anything that I want to do I make sure I give 100% and this is what happened once I got fit and started to run well. I was at my peak and no one could touch me. I never even looked at others and how fast they ran and compare myself as I was super confident of my own abilities. I was surpassing them every week and no one else mattered. I can’t believe that in the space of a few months I am back to where I started out. But, even back when I first started out I still believed in myself and I was much heavier then than I am now. I never compared myself with super fit thin others and just concentrated on going for it and feeling brilliant after achieving yet another success.
 
It’s different now, my body may not have given up totally but I know that my brain has. But this experience will force me to try again and get back what I once had. I may make friends, some of who may want to go out running regularly which will be brilliant. They may be newcomers to the fitness lark and like me, will be starting off small. But the best thing that could happen from this is that the personal trainer who is running the course has said to me that he can start to train me after the course is over. He will come running with me at anytime I want and as the weather is getting nicer we will be able to go off the beaten track.
I know that his service is not free, but I feel excited about paying someone to motivate and challenge me. That is worth loads in my book. You never know, by the summer I could be running 3 times a week again back on form!!
Lets keep our fingers crossed and I’ll send out regular updates of how I’m progressing on the course from hell!!

05/10/2010 - Morton’s Neuroma Madness!

21/08/2010 - The Wedding Journal

30/05/2010 - Running Free!!

06/05/2010 - Surprises Come In Podiatry Orthotics!!

15/04/2010 - Having Wheely Good Fun

22/03/2010 - Running Withdrawal

15/02/2010 - Swimming Towards Recovery

04/02/2010 - Help I’m Injured!